Silence Me
by Lillyington
Summary: Sequel to Barely Past. Alex is back at work and she must come to terms with her new life and that means accepting the people in it. She wants so desperately to protect the ones she loves, but she must also learn to let someone in. She will soon realise that the biggest thing to overcome in her life is herself. An Alex/Sean fic, not very good at summaries. Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

1/Alex

I slung my bag over my shoulder and rushed out of my apartment, fumbling with the key in the lock as I went. I glanced at my watch and cursed at the hands covering 9.15. I stumbled towards the stairs and tugged my fingers though my hair in replacement of a hairbrush. Just as I rounded the corner of the corridor, I collided with someone walking the other way. I cried out and my bag slipped from my shoulder, the contents spilling out.

"Typical!" I yelled loudly and before checking who the other person was I crouched to scoop my belongings back inside. Another pair of hands joined in and I looked up to see Nathan bent to help me. My heart fluttered uncomfortably as our eyes met.

"In a hurry?" he asked with a smile.

"Sorry I bumped in to you," I said quickly, straightening up and hooking the strap back on my arm.

"I'm not. You've been avoiding me," he replied.

"I'm late for work and my boss will literally kill me if I'm not there within the next ten minutes ago," I shrugged apologetically, attempting to sidestep him. I hadn't spoken or seen Nathan since the night we spent together, and between then and now a lot had happened to me.

"Alex…" he began, stepping in front of me to block my escape.

"Nathan I can't do this right now, we'll talk soon I promise," I said, this time successfully stepping around him and rushing towards the stairs.

While I drove I considered moving apartments and never seeing Nathan again, and then I thought again of how I owed him an explanation for my disappearance several weeks ago. I had put Nathan in danger by allowing anything to happen between us and then I had run, hiding in the only thing I knew: my work and my overall mission to find the people who murdered my parents. In turn I had run into trouble during a Division operation and spent the last few weeks in Division going through withdrawal. This was the first week I had been back in my own apartment.

Division headquarters is in the middle of nowhere. When you reach a certain point on the drive you can see only fields and trees. Only someone looking for it would see it was there; a hidden road leading into a thicket of trees. I parked over the specific pressure spot and cut the engine. Then I pressed the home screen on my satnav and dialled in. There was a confirming click and then the car began to descent into the ground. I watched through the windscreen as the machinery above moved back in to place and the earth swallowed me up into darkness. I felt the wheels touchdown in the underground and a set of large circular metal doors slid soundlessly open in front of me. Light flooded back into the world and I started the engine, driving slowly into the car park. My usual spot was free and I parked up before swinging out of the car as fast as I could and hurrying towards the doors which would lead me into Division. I keyed in the code and the doors slid easily open. With a sigh I stepped inside, pressed my fingerprint against the reader, and felt myself being taken further underground.

For years I had fought the chains of a system which had held me prisoner. I had worked with an outsider, a rogue agent named Nikita to bring down this very system. Never did I think that I would be intentionally going through the doors of my own accord. And yet here I was watching the doors of the elevator slide smoothly open onto an empty white corridor which would lead me to the one thing I had tried so hard to escape.

Division. My worst nightmare and my only chance of justice.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello everyone, thank you for the positive comments for chapter one, here is the next chapter and I hope you like it. Hope everyone had a fantastic Christmas! Much love x

2/Alex

Operations was busy as usual. The room fell suspiciously quiet when I stepped inside and I looked calmly around at the team. Birkhoff who sat proudly at his post was the only person in the room who didn't look up at me when I walked past. Instead he continued to scroll through his computer, completely oblivious to the change in atmosphere. I swallowed nervously but kept my head high as I strolled past the rows of computers and uncomfortable stares and towards Amanda's office. I didn't bother knocking on the door but strolled straight in and marched up to her desk. She was sat with her arms crossed over her chest and as I approached her, she raised one eyebrow. As I stood in front of her she glanced obviously down at her watch before her eyes finally rested on me.

"I was starting to worry," she said coolly.

"Worried I might blow off work for a hit?" I shot back.

"You don't work for me anymore Alex. You're here because you want to be, and I can help you get what you want. However, you have information which is very sacred to Division and therefore when you don't show, there are certain things that I worry about," Amanda said and there was no kindness in her voice. "Are we clear?" she asked.

"Crystal," I snapped and turned on my heel.

"Oh and Alex," she said before I reached the door. I fought the urge to roll my eyes but turned slowly to face her.

"Sean's been looking for you. He's been worried, but I have a feeling it's for different reasons," she smiled coldly. I ignored her and threw the door open, slamming it behind me before striding towards Operations. This time when I entered there was no lull in noise and no wary glances. I moved over to Birkhoff and put a hand on his shoulder. At my touch, he jumped and glared up at me accusingly.

"Oh Alex it's only you! It's good to see you, you look well," he cried, stumbling over his words slightly. I smiled and felt a wave of relief crash over me. I knew I could depend on Birkhoff to lighten the mood and act totally normal.

"Thanks," I grinned, squeezing his shoulder. I boosted myself onto the edge of his desk while he got back to his work, craning my neck to nosey at the screen.

The sound of the doors sliding open caused the room to go quiet again and I glanced up to see Sean Pierce striding into the room, followed by Amanda. Our eyes met and my breathing hitched slightly, but I managed to tear my gaze away before he could have too much of an effect on my pulse. The corners of his lips tilted up slightly and then any trace of a smile was wiped clean by a professional and controlled expression. He handed a tablet screen to Amanda and stepped back to allow her centre stage.

"Thank you everyone for being on time if not early for today's briefing," Amanda called and a bubble of hatred rose in my throat as she shot a look in my direction. "So, Birkhoff, if you wouldn't mind pulling up a picture of Lady and Sir Everwood?"

Birkhoff's fingers flew across the keyboard as he searched every database in the world for the matching names. Thirteen results flashed on his screen, but after pulling them through a filter, he was left with three. With a click of a button, the results were beamed onto the overhead screen. Amanda could now control what Operations saw through the handheld tablet which she cradled.

"Thank you Birkhoff," she smiled before clearing her throat and continuing. "This is Lady and Sir Everwood and they are Russian drug lords. They have been of keen interest to Division for a number of years under the watchful eye of Percy. I was never told and therefore never understood the importance of these names; however in the past few weeks they have crossed the border into America and appear to have disappeared without a trace. They hide behind their titles, but are malicious and will stop at nothing to make their blood money. So why am I telling you this? Well, there have been a number of deaths on the streets of New York in the past few weeks, following the same time frame that the Everwood's have been present in our country. These deaths are not random, but are tied in with the drug underbelly of the city. There is a lot of money vanishing from large names bank accounts, and money appearing in Russian banks. This is in no doubt work of the Everwood's and we must work to stop them from destroying anymore lives."

Amanda touched the screen in her hands and an overhead map of New York scrolled onto the overhead screen. A red circle was over an outer-city town. I squinted to read the letters but didn't recognise the town's name.

"This is the town of Mooresheer and is where the Everwood's were last spotted. I want us all to be on the lookout for any inconsistencies in American bank accounts or suspicious drug or money related movement. Thanks for your time and I'll be briefing soon on further action. Report to me if you find anything," she finished and turned to exit.

"Why do they pose a threat if there are only two of them?" I called out. I looked back up at the images of the Everwood's. Sir Everwood was at least six foot and had a shaved head. He was in his late forties and his eyes were dark and hollow and his mouth was set in a hard unforgiving line. His arms were bare on the photo and masses of tattoos laced his skin. His wife however was petite and blonde, maybe in her thirties and smiled at the camera in a dizzy careless fashion. I wouldn't put the two together. Amanda swung around to face me, sighed heavily as if answering my question was the last thing she wanted to do in the world and then cleared her throat to address the room.

"They have been part of a Russian 'kill squad' since they left high school and for all we know are working amongst American dealers to form a dangerous team. Don't underestimate the individual, Alex," she said impatiently before shutting off the overhead, shoving the tablet back into Sean's hands and storming out of the room, her heels clicking methodically on the tiles.

"You always seem to get her knickers in a twist…" Birkhoff whispered to me and I flashed him a grin. I was thankful that the room's noise level had returned to normal.

"It seems so," I nodded, trying to avoid Sean's penetrating gaze. I made the mistake of glancing up at him and our eyes were immediately glued to each other. He made his way over towards me and I scrambled off Birkhoff's desk in an attempt to get away, but he caught my arm and forced me round to face him. I closed my eyes in order to compose myself and then beamed a smile.

"Sean," I said, but my voice sounded oddly cheerful and his frown told me it wasn't the correct tone to be taking. I cleared my throat and shrugged my arm free.

"Alex, we need to talk," he said, jerking his head in the direction of the hallway which led to the training centre and dorms. I sighed loudly and then followed him outside and down the corridor. He stopped outside one of the dorm doors, unlocked it and held the door open for me. I eyed him cautiously before stepping inside. He followed swiftly, shutting the door behind him, separating us from the rest of Division. I looked around the empty room filled only with a metal bed and from experience I knew the mattress wasn't comfortable. There was also a set of metal drawers which were nailed to the ground and a dressing table complete with metal chair. The walls were painted a shocking white, the door the only splash of dark colour.

I spun around to face Sean and was shocked by his close proximity. He was a good head taller than me and even in my heels I was looking up at him to meet his dark eyes.

"What are you playing at?" I snapped.

"Have you lost your phone?" he retorted, calmly. It was a trick question. My phone was tucked snugly in my suit dress pocket, along with the hundreds of missed calls and worried texts from Sean.

"What do you want from me Sean?" I asked, taking the offended and exasperated route. I knew I was being unfair and a part of me felt guilty, but it was the only way I knew how to react when I was backed into a corner. It was something Division had taught me.

"Alex I don't want anything from you except honesty and maybe an explination for where you disappeared to after you left my flat," he breathed, pinching the bridge of his nose and then turning his dark gaze on me.

"I don't have to report my every move and my whereabouts to you," I hissed.

"I've been worried about you Alex," his voice was full of desperate calmness and I knew it was a lot of effort to keep from yelling at me for my unfairness. But I couldn't let him in and I couldn't let him close. It was far too dangerous, so I had to get angry at him for caring about me instead.

"Why is everyone so worried about me, I'm fine!" I cried, throwing my arms up.

"I know that withdrawal isn't easy, and being in the outside world can be tempting and I hadn't heard from you…" Sean said quickly. Then he did something that made my blood boil. It was only a very quick flick of his eyes, but I spotted his gaze move to my arms and then back to my face.

I jerked my blazer sleeves up past my elbows and held my arms out to Sean. "Look, I haven't been using! We ran into trouble and it was dealt with. I can handle it, just like I did before. And when I went through withdrawal the first time, Sean, you weren't there to hold my hand so will you quit worrying about me all the time!" I yelled, "I'm not as weak as you seem to think I am," I added, and my voice wavered uncomfortably with the threat of tears. I tugged my sleeves back into place and then brushed past Sean towards the door.

"Alex I…"

I didn't wait to listen to what he had to say, but reached for the door handle, swung outside into the cool corridor and marched away, not even thinking where I was headed. And in that moment of frustration and anger I realised how trapped I still was in the labyrinth which stretched miles underground. I thought and hated how much a prisoner I still was in my own life.


	3. Chapter 3

3/Alex

I spent the rest of the day avoiding Amanda and Sean and pretty much anybody really. I oversaw several classes with Birkhoff and when nothing more was said about the Everwood operation I headed home.

It took me almost fifteen minutes to get out of the rabbit warren that was Division and into the car park. I waited until I was safely locked inside my car before I let out a heavy breath that I felt I had been holding all day. I let my head drop back against the headrest and counted slowly to ten before I shoved the key into the ignition, revved the engine and reversed out of my spot without even looking in my mirrors. I shoved the car into first gear and moved towards the pressure lift which would take me above ground. While I waited for the doors to slide shut and the lift to whir into life I allowed my thoughts to drift away from work.

Something had shifted between me and Sean. I'd felt something growing between us even before the mission at the club, but I had sworn nothing could come of it due to our line of work. We weren't allowed to let anyone close, and I was very aware of the consequences of emotional attachment to others. So I had held Sean and everybody else at arms-length. The only person I had ever opened up to after my parents had been murdered and my life changed forever was Nikita, and it hadn't been easy learning to trust another.

I had kissed Sean during the days after the Division side mission. I had broken every rule I had ever set myself and crossed a line that Division itself had drawn. At the time it was totally right and true, something we both needed. It had been the release we had both pined for after the building tension that had grown between us, and the only way I could think to erase Sean's mounting guilt over my run in with drugs. But after I had gone through withdrawal with Amanda and finally moved back into my own apartment, I had realised what a mistake I had made. I had given Sean the signal that I was romantically interested in him. I couldn't deny that I was attracted to him in more ways than appearance, something ran between us like electricity, but I couldn't act upon that attraction. The night I returned home, I threw up my walls and bolted my emotional door. It was the only way I could keep us safe. Division did not have a good outlook on relationships. Nikita had learned that the hard way, but I wasn't as strong as she was.

Then there was Nathan. My neighbour from across the hallway. When I had first moved into my apartment he had knocked on my door and offered me his friendship, asking for nothing in return. He was handsome and dangerously normal. Without Percy or Michael or Amanda breathing down my neck and reminding me of Division's rules I had truly believed that I had my freedom back, and had gladly accepted Nathan's kindness. His kindness turned into attraction and that led to one step further. He had truly cared about me, and I had reciprocated. We had spent one night together and in the morning I had cried. Not because I regretted my involvement with Nathan, but because of the harsh reality that we would never be able to spend our days together. I had asked him to leave, and we hadn't spoken properly or seen one another since. It was for the best, but I couldn't help but feel the guilt which nibbled at my conscience. He deserved better.

The mechanical groan came to a halt and I blinked in the sunlight outside. I kicked the engine into life and reversed down the hidden dirt track with one arm braced on the back of the passenger's seat. With a jerk of the steering wheel I spun the car around to face home and stomped on the gas. I needed to put as much distance between me and Division as I could. I felt red hot hatred for the system which kept my hands bound behind my back and blinked tears of frustration away. I needed to accept the fact that I couldn't have a normal relationship with somebody without putting them in unspeakable danger. My hands shook as I gripped the wheel and knocked the car up a gear. Just as I ran a stop sign my mobile chirped in my pocket. I forced myself back to reality, blew out a shaky sigh and slowed to just over the speed limit. Keeping my eyes on the empty road, I reached for my phone and flicked the screen into life. It was a text from a blocked number which I knew to be Michael. The message said nothing but a single address. I knew Rockstreet was a block just several away from mine which was mostly taken up with rundown warehouses and boarded up shops, a place not unusual for our meetings. It was a neighbourhood where drug deals were concealed and the homeless set fires out of sight. The roads were busier where I was now and pedestrians rushed to and fro wherever I looked. I eased the car past the block I lived on. Michael didn't need a reply; he knew I'd be there. I stuffed the phone back into my pocket and took a turn which would lead me to Rockstreet.

I parked the car outside the address written in the text and stared up at the warehouse. Eight out of ten of the windows were smashed or void of glass, and the other two were boarded up with planks of wood splashed with graffiti. I rolled my eyes at the choice of location before swinging out of the car and locking up. I checked each door twice and headed towards a side entrance. Sure enough there was a door hanging open, banging against the dirty black outside wall in the wind. Without thinking, I touched a hand to my gun which was tucked neatly into my specially tailored jacket inside pocket. Reassured that it was there, I ducked inside and walked as far as I could before I was in total blackness. The abandoned storeroom in which I stood had no windows to let in the fading sunlight, so my only light source was that which spilled through the door. I could make out several boxes, an empty sleeping bag, a dirty saucepan and several discarded wrappers from crisps and other food packets. The set up reminded me of a darker time in my life when I used to live under bridges and in doorways, feeding my addiction before myself.

"Alex," a reassuringly familiar voice travelled out from the corner of the large empty room and I spun around to face Nikita. I couldn't help the smile which sprung to my face as I hurried towards her and threw my arms around her. In the weeks after my withdrawal and recovery I had had little contact with Nikita. I knew she had been there and was part of the reason I was recovered from the underbelly of the club on the operation. And Division knew it too. They weren't happy about her involvement; they never were.

"It's good to see you," I sighed as she ran her hands over my cheeks and down my arms. She was smiling at me, but I could see there was something wrong even in the dim light. I tugged her hand and moved us into the stream of light from the door. I stifled a gasp when I saw her bruised face.

"What happened?" I swallowed noisily and touched gentle fingers to the purple bruise which bloomed under her left eye. She flinched slightly and closed her eyes. Now I knew why she had chosen such a dark and secluded spot to meet. She had intended for our conversation to be in the pitch black. I studied the rest of her injuries, making out several deep slashes in her cheeks which had been hastily stitched up, a painful looking split lip and a smaller cut under her right eye. It wasn't like Nikita to look so worn.

"We ran into some Division trouble a few nights ago. They cornered us in a car park and one guy beat the hell out of me in front of Michael. He was left untouched," she explained.

"Why? How?" I mumbled, still assessing the damage.

"There were about seven of them, five men and two women, all hooded and masked. There were no active missions at the time so we weren't on guard like we should have been, but they got Michael first. One of the women was asking us for directions when Michael was knocked out from behind. I tried to fight off the one guy, but two others sprung on me and I was overpowered. The girl who asked for directions was strong. Two guys held me while two held Michael. Then another laid into me pretty good and the two women had a good go. Before they left they told me that Amanda was still looking for me, and that I was in deep trouble if I kept trying to fight them. They left me pretty beat up, but Michael managed to patch me up okay," at the mention of his name her eyes glazed happily, but she shook herself back to reality and continued, "what I need to find out firstly is why they didn't kill me or take me in to Amanda alive. Secondly, I need to find out who the bastards are and then I'm going to find them. " Something dangerous glittered in her eyes and a bad feeling was creeping up my spine.

"Is that why you arranged to meet me here today?" I asked.

"Partly. I didn't want you to see me this way: broken," she said, but her voice was undefeated.

"Where is Michael?"

"He won't leave our base… He's ashamed that he couldn't save me. I've told him he's the only reason I'm still going strong, but he won't accept. I think he's just sulking," she grinned, and a wave of familiarity swept over me. I'd been through something similar with Sean when I'd seen his guilt over what happened to me eating him up.

"So what do you need me to do?" I asked, pushing the memory to the back of my mind.

"This has to be a private order from Amanda. It isn't Division's style as a whole. She keeps a log of every operation, side mission, undercover op, clean up, extraction- everything that goes on. If she ordered it, there's a record of it. I need you to find it, find out why, find out who and report back. I've never known Amanda to be so personal, so I'll have to get personal back. Do you think you can do that?" she asked, her eyes burning with something I couldn't quite place.

"Sure," I nodded, "go… home, wherever that is, and get some rest." I added, turning to leave.

"I will. Oh and Alex, be careful out there. Amanda is always up to something, don't mistake her for someone you can trust," she smiled sadly. She was speaking from experience, the wisdom in her voice heavy and ominous.

"Never," I replied. Our eyes met with quiet understanding before I turned away and headed outside. The sun was beginning to set and the daylight was fading fast. I ducked into my car and didn't wait to watch Nikita leave safely before I peeled out of the alley and onto the main road.


	4. Chapter 4

4/Alex

By the time I got home the sun had set and the parking-lot was shrouded in complete darkness. Usually when I pulled in, the sensory light would click on but tonight they refused to cooperate, so when I turned my headlights out, I was left in pitch black. I groaned loudly, knowing how typical it was. Luckily I knew the way to the door which would lead me safely inside, so I moved quickly, my heels echoing noisily against the walls. Something about Nikita's ambushing had snagged at me and I cast a quick glance around the empty lot. I tugged open the door and stepped into the well-lit corridor, deciding to take the stairs.

When I passed Nathan's door, I felt a stab of guilt and made a mental note to see and speak to him. Soon. I owed him an explination for my rudeness this morning. Just as I was searching for my keys I heard the lift clatter to a stop and then the sound of loud laughter. I routed faster in my bag, recognising Nathan's voice amongst others. If I could just find the damn key and get inside I wouldn't need to speak to him this soon. There was the sound of stumbling followed by a loud noise of someone falling over, a short spurt of silence, and then several people burst into fits of giggles. Nathan wasn't alone and they didn't sound sober. My hands brushed papers and lip-glosses, packets of tissues and my mobile phone, but not my keys. I swore under my breath and then my fingers clasped around the jagged edge of my keychain. I thrust the correct key first time into the lock and threw myself against the door, tumbling into my apartment just as the group of people rounded the corner. I hoped I had been fast enough to avoid detection.

After slamming my door shut and switching all the lights on, I checked through my mail and listened to my answering machine. Two messages from Division this morning asking me where I was and why I was late. One from Sean since I'd last seen him asking me whether I was okay and telling me to answer his calls. After deleting all three I heated some left over pasta and decided to change into some comfortable clothes. I stripped down and settled for a pair of leggings and an oversized jumper, deciding it wasn't quite late enough for pjs. I did, however, slip on my fluffy boot-style-slippers. Then I tugged my curls back into a loose scruffy bun and curled up on my sofa to watch some TV.

Just as I began to flick through the channels, there was a knock at my door.

Breathing a heavy sigh I climbed to my feet and shuffled over. I peeped through the spy-hole and saw Nathan leaning against the doorframe, one hand outstretched as if to hold him up. I was about to sneak away and pretend I hadn't heard anything when his eyes snapped up to mine. I knew he couldn't see me, but there was something in his stare that made my heart shake. Hoping I wasn't making a mistake, I unhooked the latch and opened the door. Nathan almost fell on top of me. When he steadied himself, he gave me a goofy drunken grin and held his hands up in apology.

"Sorry about that, I wasn't prepared," he said, not quite slurring.

"Can I help you with anything?" I asked, maybe a little too bluntly. His apartment door was cracked open and there was loud music coming from inside. I could hear people laughing and someone singing very badly to the song that was playing.

"Burn," Nathan gasped, holding his hands over his chest in mock offence.

"Nathan, you're drunk and you're missing your own party. We'll talk at a better time," I sighed.

"I am not drunk. I've only had a few and I'm not feeling the party," he said, bracing his hands on either side of the doorframe, leaning slightly towards me "I just want to speak to you, please let me in?"

When I didn't open the door wider or move to let him in, he leaned closer to me and continued.

"The last time I saw you was after we stayed together, and you were crying. Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you? Then you just vanished off the grid, no trace, no sight of you for weeks. I was worried you'd upped and left…" he said. He went on in a hushed voice, "please Alex, I can't stop thinking about you."

"It's hard to explain," I muttered, shaking my head and attempting to close the door.

"It can't be that hard," he insisted. Before I could respond he had stepped inside, forcing the door open. "Is this hard to explain?" he breathed, grasping my hand and pressing it firmly to his chest over his heart. I gasped, opening my mouth to complain when he leaned closer as if to place his lips on mine. I turned my face to one side, escaping the kiss before I could respond positively. This couldn't happen. Nathan groaned in disappointment and then dropped his gaze to the floor.

"Sexy choice of footwear," he smiled at my slippers. I couldn't help the smile which spread across my face and the small breath of laughter. The sound felt foreign and I realised I couldn't remember the last time I'd found something funny.

"You didn't do anything wrong Nathan, I just don't think it was wise of me to...for us to have complicated our friendship," I said carefully. I watched as Nathan's brow creased with a frown at my words.

"I don't mind complications, in fact I like them. I think they're good, especially when they look as cute as you," he said with a charming grin. I felt the urge to return his smile, but something was tugging at my mind.

"Nathan, I do like you but nothing can happen between us again," I said, "I like you as a friend," I added.

"Do you often sleep with people who you see as friends?" he replied stubbornly.

"Between moving to a new place and my job, I'm not going to have time for a relationship," I went on, moving towards the door and holding it open. Nathan's eyes followed me and then darted into the hallway. He seemed to consider something and then walked towards me. Before he turned to leave he faced me.

"Nathan please, you're making this really hard," I sighed, tucking a few stray hairs behind my ears.

"Something's happened that's made you change your mind about me," he said, his eyes burning intensely.

"I'm really busy with work," I insisted, "it wouldn't be fair on you."

He made a noise which told me he didn't believe me for one moment, and then he stepped past me into the hallway. I was about to close the door when he pressed a hand to stop me. He opened his mouth to speak and then stopped himself.

"I'll see you around?" he asked.

"Of course," I smiled.

I was jerked out of sleep by the sound of footsteps outside my bedroom door. I hadn't slept deeply since my parents were murdered, and the slightest noise out of place would wake me. In the few weeks of safety after Nikita had saved me the very first time, I hadn't slept at all. Between haunting nightmares and the strange sounds of a new place, I had been lucky to get more than a few hours of sleep a night.

I reached silently for the gun which I kept in the bedside drawer and sat up against the headboard. The footsteps seemed to halt somewhere down the hallway and I held my breath as I carefully rolled out of bed and tip-toed towards my bedroom door. I glanced at my alarm clock, the numbers blinking 3.20AM. Who was sneaking around my apartment at 3 in the morning? In one swift movement I threw the heavy sliding door open and leapt into the hallway. My apartment was wide open plan so from my bedroom I could see the living area and the kitchen. Near my sofa stood a tall hooded figure with his back to me.

"Turn around or I'll shoot you!" I yelled. The person froze and slowly raised his arms so his hands were level with his shoulders as a sign of surrender.

"Turn around!" I shouted. Just as slowly he began to turn towards me.

"What the hell are you doing in my apartment Sean?" I snapped, lowering my gun and clipping the safety on. At the same time he nudged the hood off his head and dropped his hands. I moved towards him and flicked on the living room lamp. I placed the gun on the coffee table and then spun to face Sean, hands on hips and eyebrows raised. I watched as his eyes assessed me and then I immediately felt self-conscious as I stood in front of him wearing only a vest top and night shorts.

"Hold that thought," I mumbled and brushed past him. In my room I pulled an oversized hoody over my pjs and even fluffed my hair in the mirror. Kicking myself I groaned and hurried back into the main room to confront Sean. He had settled himself comfortably into my dark leather sofa and had his arms spread out across the back of it. As I approached he turned his face to look at me and his eyes creased with a smile he tried to hide.

"I've seen you in less clothes that that," he grinned and I knew he was referring to my bikini number from that mission which seemed so far ago now.

"Don't remind me…" I muttered, rolling my eyes and taking a seat beside him, shuffling to the back of the sofa and wrapping my arms around my knees.

"Are you going to explain what you're doing here?" I demanded when neither of us spoke. He angled his body to face me, tucking one knee under the other so he sitting sideways. He had taken off his black jacket and he was wearing dark jeans and a snug black tee that didn't do much to hide his muscular chest.

"I…" he began but I cut him off.

"Was worried about me?" I said bitterly.

"You left early and you haven't returned my calls even though a distinctly remember me leaving you a message asking you to do so," he said, a hint of amusement in his low voice, "We needed to talk at some point," he added with a shrug.

"It's three in the morning," I reminded him, narrowing my eyes.

"I couldn't sleep," he countered, not missing a beat.

"How did you get inside?"

To this he didn't answer, he just flashed me a dark smile.

"Sean, what were you planning on doing if I hadn't woken up to the sound of you snooping?" I quizzed him, my voice dropping its cold tone just slightly.

"I was looking for you. I would have woken you. Nicely," he grinned.

"For a chat?" I said, my eyebrows shooting up and sarcasm dripping from my tone.

"Alex you need to stop being so mad at me," he sighed suddenly, dragging a hand through his hair. It had grown longer and was beginning to curl slightly around his ears. He looked good, but I shook the thought away quickly. I was suddenly shocked by the urge to run my own hands through his hair and move closer.

"I'm sorry if I offended you earlier, I didn't mean to. I should have known how strong you are and believed in you more. But can you blame me for worrying? I haven't seen you in weeks and the last time I saw you I was dropping you off at Division in a terrible state. I felt terrible for leaving you with that witch Amanda and I wish there was more I could have done to help you," he said slowly and carefully, as if worried I was going to snap at him any moment. "If it's any consolation, you looked good today. Healthy I mean," he smiled. I hoped the low light from the lamp disguised the colour rising to my cheeks.

"Sean…" I breathed, inching just slightly closer.

The truth of the matter was that I was flattered by his concern. Something about the way he worried made my heart beat that tiny bit faster. But at the same time I was terrified at what that meant.

"Something else is bothering you," he said quietly.

"Yes, ever since we kissed I've been thinking," I replied slowly, the memory sending a warm shiver up my spine. "And I've come to the only conclusion that I can think of."

"I'm not going to like this am I?" he grinned grimly.

"I think it's best if we don't complicate our relationship," I said for the second time that night. This time the words weighed heavily in my stomach and felt awkward on my lips.

"I don't think that's what you want," Sean said, suddenly grasping my hands in his. My heart leaped into my throat and I had a hard time swallowing it back down.

"You should leave Sean," I said quietly, but I didn't pull away.

"You wouldn't throw me out at such an early hour, now would you?" he smiled.

"It's too dangerous, you know what happens in Division if we have feelings for people," I said, dropping my voice as if someone could hear us and catch us out for even having this conversation.

"Screw Division, I don't care about that. I really like you Alex, and I know you feel the same," Sean whispered, "I won't let them hurt you," he added.

"I can't protect you from them Sean. They'll hurt me if they kill you, and that's what happens," I snapped, tugging my hands free and jumping to my feet. I paced in front of the sofa with my hands knotted at the back of my neck. Sean shifted his body around so he was facing forwards now, his elbows braced on his knees as he watched me through dark thoughtful eyes.

"They wouldn't dare. My mother is higher up than Amanda or anyone at Division. They can't touch me," he said with a hint of smugness in his voice. I spun to face him and searched his face. Technically he was right. He wasn't Division. He had been placed in Amanda's hands when the power had shifted to her. He was keeping an eye on the running of Operations and mission control. His Mother was a senator and she was keeping tabs on all movement. She and her team had more control than Division liked to admit. That technically made Sean untouchable. And yet accidents happened all the time with Amanda around. And she hated me enough to go after me any way she could, dealing with any sticky consequences afterwards…

"This isn't a joke, Sean," I hissed.

"I'm aware," he muttered in response. We just stayed that way, staring at one another for several long minutes. Then Sean stood, stepped up to me and gathered me in his arms. I was too tired to fight him, so I let him pull me close. His warm arms felt surprisingly safe and I wanted to stay there forever, never having to face the outside world. I gradually moved my own hands up around his back, returning the embrace. I yawned slowly and tried to blink the tiredness away, but Sean had spotted. He backed us up against the couch and laid his body across it, pulling me alongside him. I was tucked between his muscular body and the back of the sofa.

"We have tonight," he mumbled in my ear, brushing my hair off my face. I didn't argue or question him about whether he had been followed or if he had been seen entering my building. I couldn't open my mouth long enough to let the words tumble out. I closed my eyes, so tired of worrying and thinking. I breathed in Sean's scent beside me, all fresh linen mixed with mint. He was holding me tightly, and rubbing soothing circled into my lower back. I felt the tides of sleep tugging at my consciousness and my vision blurring. With a heavy sigh, I let the waves drag me under.


	5. Chapter 5

5/Sean

I lay beside her that night, too content with the world to move. I drifted in and out of dreams, but none of them were as sweet as the reality of having Alex back in my arms. Her sofa was just large enough to fit both of our bodies, and long enough that my feet and the top of my head were both touching either end. She slept silently, her eyes closed softly and her breath coming in tiny sighs. She barely moved a muscle, with one arm nestled between our bodies and one hand laid across my chest. I wasn't particularly comfortable, but I didn't dare move.

My thoughts strayed to our previous conversation and despite my reassurances; I felt a terrible shadow hanging over everything I had said. My mother was technically higher up in government than Amanda, but everything Division did was underground and covered up nicely. If they wanted to get rid of me, or Alex, it would be done quietly. I couldn't risk losing her, but I couldn't live without her. Ever since we met there had been something between us, just a tiny spark to begin with which grew into something more. She had hated me at first and trusted me even less. She had ignored my orders, denied my help and insulted me at any chance she got. But as the days and weeks went by, she grew to trust me and she even grew to like me. And I, too, had grown to like her. I wanted to be with her, but I knew we had to tread carefully in order to keep out of danger. I would do anything to keep her safe. I had tried staying away from her, and it hadn't worked.

At six thirty I decided that I wasn't going to get much more sleep, so I carefully rolled off the sofa and moved towards the bathroom. I splashed my face with some cool water, used a dab of toothpaste on my finger to freshen my mouth and ran my hands through my hair in the mirror. The natural curls were beginning to grow out and I wasn't sure if I liked it, but a haircut was last on my to-do-list. I headed back into the main room to see that Alex was still asleep.

Her kitchen was large, open and all pine with a work station in the centre. There was no clutter or mess and little evidence that the kitchen had ever been used. Sideboards stretched out across one wall which ended with the fridge. I started there, pulling it open and searching inside. It was stocked with the bare minimum; milk, juice, eggs. Her freezer was empty. I set about looking in the cupboards and at the end of my rather unsuccessful hunt for a good breakfast, I made a mental note to take Alex shopping for groceries the moment she was awake and dressed.


	6. Chapter 6

6/Alex

My eyes fluttered slowly open and I was momentarily disorientated before the nights events came crashing back. My living room curtains were still drawn, casting a warm orange glow about the room. It couldn't be later than seven. I rolled onto my back and stared at the ceiling, cursing and kicking myself for letting Sean get so close last night and being so weak as to let him stay over. I should have pushed him out the door and slammed it on our relationship the moment he had stepped into my apartment at stupid-a-clock. He must have felt the same way or realised what a mistake he had made coming here the moment he woke as the sofa was cold and empty beside me.

"Stupid," I muttered over and over.

"Morning."

I threw myself bolt upright and spun around to see Sean stood by the couch with two mugs in his hands. I must have looked as startled as I felt because he had an amused grin on his face.

"You scared the life out of me," I snapped.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to creep up on you," he replied, still grinning as he set down both the mugs on the table and slid one towards me, "coffee."

"I thought you left," I said quietly.

"I'm not a fan of the walk of shame," he said, his smile widening.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Almost eight."

"When did you wake up? Why did you stay?"

"I couldn't sleep. I looked in your kitchen. It's empty. I'm not letting you out of my sight until we've been shopping and your cupboards are stocked. No bacon? I mean what is that?" he said, a look of confusion clouding his features and I couldn't help but laugh.

"You sure know how to treat a girl Sean," I grinned, giving him a playful nudge with my shoulder.

* * *

An hour and a half later Sean and I tumbled back into my apartment with arms full of brown paper bags spilling groceries. Sean snorted with laughter as I dumped my armful on the counter and I heaved a sigh of satisfaction.

"Are you sure I'm going to be able to eat all that ice-cream?" I asked a little unsurely as I began to rifle threw the bags for the frozen tubs. I shoved the four cartons into the freezer along with the rest of the frozen items. Sean leaned lazily against the sideboard with a smirk on his face as he watched me unpack.

"Yeah I'm pretty sure," he grinned.

"Just stand there looking pretty why don't you and watch me do all the hard work," I teased as I filled the fridge with all sorts of vegetables and other foods. I shot a glance over my shoulder and saw Sean's grin widen.

"It appears you are the one looking pretty, and I'm enjoying watching thank you," he laughed. I made a point of rolling my eyes at him.

"Nice line," I said as I moved onto stacking the cupboards. I brushed past him, bumping my shoulder against his and set about filling from the lower cabinets. I felt his eyes on me as I shoved any old thing into any old cupboard. I wasn't one for being organised. Sean's laughter warmed my skin and I saw him shaking his head in amusement.

"And yet you're such a control freak when it comes to everything else in your life," he smiled.

"I'll know where it is when I want it," I shrugged, straightening up and piling all the stray paper bags into one pile, "done!" I grinned, spreading my arms wide.

"You'll actually be able to eat food now," Sean said, "how about making a start on that ice-cream?" he added, waggling his eyebrows in a way that made me burst into laughter. He shrugged and marched to the freezer, pulling out one of the tubs of chocolate brownie ice-cream. I shook open my cutlery drawer, selected two spoons, and hoisted myself up onto the breakfast bar, not bothering to use a stool. Sean came to stand beside me and held the tub out to me. I handed him a spoon and took the first mouthful. It was partly melted due to the warm temperature outside, but it was delicious. I made a satisfied sound and Sean spooned himself a large mouthful.

"As if you can eat all that!" I cried as he shovelled a large spoonful into his mouth. It was his turn to roll his eyes, but then he took a deep breath in and shut his eyes tightly. I watched as he shook his head vigorously, bracing his hands either side of my hips, and then swallowed deeply.

"Oh my god brain-freeze!" he gasped and I couldn't help but laugh at the face he was pulling.

"You try it then, it hurts!" he cried, but he was grinning. He took my spoon and scooped a large heap of ice-cream. I pursed my lips at him and shook my head no. "I dare you," he hissed arching an eyebrow. With that, I took the spoon. Once I had swallowed the ice-cream with no problem, I grinned smugly at him and he frowned.

"No fair," was all he said. I patted his hand consolingly and then I was just sat there, my hand covering his. We both fell silent, and at the same time our eyes moved to where we were touching. I coughed to clear my throat and just as I was pulling away, he turned his hand upwards and laced his fingers through mine. He pushed the ice-cream tub away and took my other hand also. I gasped silently as he moved closer, stepping between my legs. Our gazes were locked and I couldn't tear mine away. A dark fire had ignited somewhere within me at his touch, and it was raging inside me. I opened my mouth to speak, but he had already leaned in to kiss me. I couldn't resist the urge to pull him closer. Our lips met just once and he pulled away just enough to assess my reaction. It had been too quick and something was already taking over my body. I closed the distance between us. His hands moved to my face and I ran my fingers through his hair. It was all fury and heat and passion and it burned.

We were shocked out of our embrace by the sharp ringtone in Sean's jeans pocket. He pulled away slightly, both of us snatching the chance to breathe. We remained still, the silence between us broken by the phone's demanding trill tone. Sean tipped his forehead to touch mine and I closed my eyes, shutting out the entire world. The world which said that this was wrong, despite my heart telling me it was the only thing that was right. As I caught my breath, Sean fished the Blackberry out of his pocket and pressed it to his ear.

"Sean Pierce," he answered. I smoothed my hair and ran a hand across the front of Sean's black tee, feeling his muscles tense at my touch. As he spoke he didn't tear his eyes away from mine, and I watched as his face fell.

"Yes I understand. No that isn't a problem. No you aren't interrupting anything, I'll be right there." He ended the call and shoved the phone back into his pocket.

"Duty calls?" I asked my voice barely above a whisper.

"As it always does," he groaned.

"Will I be needed?" I asked. Part of me hoped the answer was no so that I didn't have to go back to Division, didn't have to see Amanda, and I could stay in the safety of my apartment, pretending there were no rules locked tightly around my life. Part of me wanted him to answer yes so he would have to take me with him.

"No. That was a call from Amanda directly; she needs my help with something in Division. She said it wasn't anything to do with any current operations," he said, stepping away from me and striding to the living area. I watched as he picked up his jacket and thrust his arms inside. He checked his pockets for all his belongings and then marched back to me.

"I don't want to leave you," he murmured, placing a kiss on my lips.

"Then don't…" I whispered, unable to bite my tongue. He let out a frustrated sigh and ran his hands through my hair, the sensation sending tingles down my spine. He tucked my hair behind my ears and I pulled the collar of his jacket straight.

"I won't stay away from you any longer, Alex. I don't care how much you want us to leave this alone, I just can't," he breathed. Then he kissed my forehead gently, and before I could formulate a reply, he was gone.


	7. Chapter 7

7/Sean

I pulled into the parking lot, scanned my ID badge at the lift and stepped inside. The metal doors slid open at Operations level and I headed towards Amanda's office. I hadn't had time to go home and change, so I was still wearing my dark jeans and a zip up hoody. I didn't doubt that Amanda would find a problem with this. I rounded the corridor and knocked on her office door which she always kept shut. She called for me to enter.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Hello Sean, close the door," she said, her tone cold and levelled. I did as I was asked and strolled forward to take a seat at her desk. She looked me over, her eyebrows arching judgementally.

"This is not an appropriate way to dress for work, Sean," she commented, her voice almost smug as she fought to keep a sly smile off her face. I narrowed my gaze and glanced briefly up at the clock on the wall. Amanda didn't miss my lack of enthusiasm for our meeting. She cleared her throat and leaned forwards, stacking her hands on top of each other on the desk.

"What's this about?" I asked.

"Late night?" she quizzed, cocking her head to one side.

"Okay, I'm out of here," I mumbled, shifting my weight as if to leave.

"Sit down Sean," Amanda snapped. I froze and slowly lowered myself back into the seat.

"I find it hard to believe that you called me in on my day off to discuss work attire," I said.

"The crooks that we're searching for, the married couple, I want the mission wiping from all files. The case is closed and that's final. You are the one that can do this job undetected and without suspicion. Birkhoff will find the records deleted and it will be a technical fault within our system. Do you understand?" she explained. When she had finished speaking, she sat with a seriously dangerous glint in her eyes.

"What's really going on? Why would you ask me to do this when Birkhoff can get it done in seconds?" I pressed, not trusting Amanda for one second.

"Because I can't have any of this tracing back to Division. Since you are not an official member of my team and therefore you are impartial."

"And you want the records wiped because…" I left the sentence hanging and gestured for her to finish.

"A group of agents traced a call and cornered them at their place of residence last night. Guess who was hiding with them? None other than Nikita herself. We brought them in and they're in our custody, but in return for their cooperation, any evidence of them being in America is being wiped clean. We now have what we wanted, Nikita and the Everwood's, the situation is contained, and now I need this ending," she said.

"I don't understand."

"I'm not asking you to understand, Sean," she hissed. It was clear that her patience was running out.

"I'll take care of it, but you owe me one," I murmured, standing to leave.

"Oh and one more thing, Sean" Amanda said as I reached the door. I heaved a sigh and turned to face her, "I know you were with Alex last night. Your tracker betrayed your whereabouts I'm afraid, and I know you were at her place from the early hours of the morning until just before you got here."

I wanted to scream. I was furious. I wanted to rip Amanda's smirk right off her face. I had not given consent for a tracker to be placed on me. I swallowed my rage and steadied my gaze on hers.

"Don't look so surprised, did you honestly believe I would let you roam around Division undetectable!" she laughed, but there was no amusement in the sound.

"I have nothing to hide, mine and Alex's relationship is strictly professional and I went to check she was alright after her first day back at work. I slept on the couch, not that you need to know anything about my personal life," I snarled. I wasn't quite lying.

"May I remind you that we do not look kindly upon any kind of relationship other than a professional one here at Division. It destroys focus, work morale, duty etcetera. You may not be under my direct authority, but Alex still is whether she likes to think so or not. She is not my agent, but she is part of Division and if she steps out of line for even a second, for any reason, it is my responsibility to fix it. You're putting yourselves at great risk by sneaking around together and don't think I won't act upon the rules. You aren't a special case, Sean," she said coldly. Her eyes penetrated mine with such ice that I felt a chill sweep over my skin. Everything about her words was silently threatening.

"You have nothing to worry about," I said, tugging on the door handle.

"I was willing to ignore the fact she stayed at your place while she was withdrawing, but any more unnecessary contact will be disciplined. Do you understand?"

"Don't patronise me, Amanda," I snapped.

"Tread carefully. And if you want me to overlook your, shall we say 'nights antics' then you'll do the job I asked of you and you'll do it well. And while you're at it, terminate Nikita. We have everything we need from her and if we let her go again, she'll never stop with her mission to destroy us. I hope you remember our little conversation when you choose your next actions," she said.

Without another word I stepped out of the office and slammed the door shut behind me.

We were in more danger than I had first thought. I rubbed my hands through my hair furiously and stormed towards the computer labs. It took me less than three minutes to delete the Everwood records from Division's system. I ran a database check and deleted all information ever kept on any government file. I was unsure of Amanda's motives, but I wasn't going to risk anything. If it meant keeping Alex safe, I would do it.

After clocking out, I headed down past the parking lot towards the training centre and cells. I asked the guard for Nikita's whereabouts and followed his directions to cell 5. I peered inside through the small glass window and saw a hunched figure curled up in the corner. The guard unlocked the door for me and I slid inside. I heard the soft click of the door behind me before approaching her.

"Has she sent you to finish me off?" her voice was hoarse from either lack of use, or from screaming. There was no fear in her words, just a simple question.

"Yes," I said. My feet had led me here, not my thoughts, and now that I was facing her, I knew I couldn't do it. This was the woman who had saved Alex's life on not one, but many occasions. She had also saved my own life and protected my mother from Division's double crossing ways. She was stronger than the system and she knew that to get what you wanted; you needed to fight for it. She was trying to make a difference, to change lives for the better, and Amanda wanted her dead. Nikita was the one thing that Division seemed unable to break.

"I knew she would be too cowardly to do it herself," Nikita laughed darkly, shuffling into a more upright position. In the small cell there was merely a grubby mattress on the floor, a sink and a toilet. A single bulb flickered overhead, the light not quite reaching the four walls. I closed the distance between us and crouched down in front of her. Even in the dim light I could see she was badly beat up. Both of her eyes were ringed with dark purple bruises, her lips were swollen and her face covered in cuts and dried blood matted her hair. She gave me a sad smile and reached for my hands.

"I've never felt so weak," she said.

We had never seen eye to eye, but we had always had the best intentions at heart despite our differences. She had always been the strong willed, powerful legend of Division, the one that got away, and now as she cowered in front of me I saw her vulnerability. I squeezed her hands.

"I'm not going to hurt you," I said, a decision I made the instant I saw her, "who did this to you?"

"Amanda hired some Russian drug ring leaders to hunt me down and warn me away from Division off the record. They cornered me and Michael in a car park several days ago. Michael hunted them down and we went to their hide out, but we were outnumbered by more than double. Michael's still there now, they beat him bad but they weren't interested in him. Turns out they had instruction to hand me over and here we are," she explained, her eyes clouding over at the mention of Michael being in danger. I envied her strength.

Something clicked into place. The Everwood's. Hired by Amanda herself to do her dirty work undetected. And she had roped me into clearing up her mess by using Alex as leverage. And now she wanted me to finish off the job so she didn't have to get her manicured fingernails dirty.

"Where are they now? The Russian's?" I asked.

"They weren't even brought in here. They're long gone. Amanda's probably deleted any trace they were ever here. She has her hands in everybody's pockets," Nikita said with an unamused smile. I swore loudly and clenched my fists. That is exactly what she had done.

"Come on, we're getting out of here," I hissed, helping Nikita to her feet.

I was done being Amanda's puppet.

I was done playing by her rules.

This had to end.

I decided that this was the last night I, or Alex, answered to Amanda.

I was getting us out.


	8. Chapter 8

8/Nikita

I had never been the kind of person to depend on others. I had learned the hard way that the only one you can trust is yourself. After Daniel had been cruelly ripped away from me I decided that nobody else would ever fill the gaping whole which had opened inside my heart. A part of me had died that day along with him. I never thought I would be able to feel the same way again, and I was partly right. Michael had sewn the seams of my pain and although the stitches were still there for a long time, eventually they had faded to a memory. I would never forget Daniel, and the love I felt for him then will never go away. He was the reason why I decided things had to change. He would always hold a special place in my heart and in my memory, but Michael had made me see that beside my grief there was also hope. He had been my light in the darkness and he had fixed me. He was my saviour, and for that I was eternally grateful.

I had never been the kind of person who needed to depend on others, and yet when I had been thrown into the dark, cold, claustrophobic cell in Division, I knew I couldn't get out of it alone. Usually I could get myself out of tricky situations, and yet here I was with no backup, no plan, no hope and I was in the very place I hated the most.

When I saw Sean's face at the window, two thoughts flew through my mind. The first was a flicker of relief and the possibility of getting out of Division alive. The second was less pleasant. I didn't bother to speak when he opened the creaking steel cage door and stepped inside. He made his way towards me, reaching where I sat in three strides. I heard him crouch and then I met his eyes.

"Has she sent you to finish me off?" I asked. My voice crackled like hot desert sand and I coughed gently to shake my words loose. I had been in this cell for over ten hours with not so much as a slice of bread or a glass of water. My wounds had not been seen to so I didn't doubt that I looked a state. This was confirmed with Sean's worried gaze as he studied me. He admitted his motives for his visit and I laughed coldly.

"I knew she would be too cowardly to do it herself," I hissed.

"Who did this to you?" Sean asked with genuine worry etched on his face.

I explained to him how Amanda had paid for a Russian gang to find, threaten and beat me. He listened with an unusual look in his eyes and when I had finished, he didn't look surprised or confused, but suddenly enlightened as if I had answered an important question. He looked angry to say the least. With a low growl he helped me to my feet, muttering something about getting out of here. We were supposed to be on separate teams, enemies to the very core. And yet we had more in common than most of his allies. I let him help me, and I was surprised at how physically weak I was. In the scuffle at the Russian's place last night, someone had hit my ankle hard with a baseball bat, and I feared it was sprained if not broken. Sean supported my weight as I hobbled towards the cell door.

"I've had strict orders to remove this woman," he told the security guard through the window.

"Get off me you son of a bitch, don't you touch me! I won't go to her, you won't take me! Take your hands off me, help!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I struggled against Sean's grip just enough to be convincing, but I was worried that if I fought anymore, I would collapse. Sean pulled me firm against him and the guard opened the door. He glanced at us and gestured for Sean to step past him, which he did, dragging me along after him. I bit back a whine of pain as I staggered forwards on my ankle. We had done enough to get passed this level security, but I hoped Sean had a plan of how to get me to ground level undetected.

We met no resistance on the way to the lift. Our luck ran out when the doors opened at dorms and a patrol guard was stood waiting to step inside. He glanced up and our eyes met. There was a moment when everything seemed to stop. He looked from Sean to me and something must have clicked in his memory and he launched into action.

"Hey!" he called as I frantically hit the button for the doors to close. I was too slow and he was inside the small space, lunging for me. Sean was fast and he delivered a smooth blow to the face which sent the guard down with a heavy thud. I gasped as I tried to push him out of the lift as he was stopping the doors from sliding closed.

"Oi, what do you think you're doing?!" yelled another voice and a second guard rounded the corner at a run. Sean helped me to roll the unconscious man out of the lift, and the doors began to close. The guard drew his weapon and a loud shot rang out.

The doors sealed shut just after the bullet hit me.


	9. Chapter 9

9/Sean

The gun shots rang out loud and piercing as the elevator doors slid easily shut. I turned to Nikita triumphantly, but my heart lurched uncomfortably in my chest. Something was wrong. I felt the colour drain from my face when I saw the blood. The bullet had hit her in her torso, just below her breast and she was clutching the wound, blood trickling between her fingers and spreading out across her white blouse. Our eyes met and hers reflected mine, full of fear. I breathed her name as she began to crumple, catching her body and helping her onto her knees.

"Nikita, I need you to stay with me," I gasped, panic rising in my chest as I pressed my hands over hers to try and stop the blood.

"Get me out of here Sean, I don't want to die in this hell-hole," she hissed, tears swelling in her eyes as she turned her hand up and clutched my fingers.

"You're not going to die," I whispered firmly. The elevator clattered noisily to a halt and I scooped her tiny body into my arms. The metal doors opened to reveal the surprisingly quiet parking lot and I quickly and easily carried Nikita towards my car. There was the sound of alarms ringing in the distance but no guards had made it to this level yet. I threw the car's back door open and carefully laid Nikita on the seat, not caring that her blood soaked the leather.

"It's going to be okay," I breathed, brushing her hair away from her face with bloody hands. She tried to smile up at me but tears were staining her face and blood trickled from her mouth. She shook her head and let out a whine as I closed the door and rushed around to the driver's side. I threw the car into reverse and sped towards the exit, making it out just before the lockdown gates crashed down. I revved the engine noisily and stomped on the gas. I hit well over the speed limit and ran two stop signs, my heart hammering against my chest. I threw a look over my shoulder and feared the worst when I saw Nikita's closed eyes, her body still.

"Nikita stay with me!" I yelled, facing back towards the road.

Panic tore through me like a hurricane and I fished my phone from my trouser pocket.

I couldn't go to the hospital; Nikita was not on any record or file. According to the government, she didn't exist, and therefore she couldn't be treated.

I pulled the car onto Fifth Street as Alex answered the phone.

"Alex call Michael, we've got an emergency. I'll be with you in two, get towels!" I cried.


	10. Chapter 10

**This is the final chapter of Silence Me. I hope you have enjoyed it. Thanks for all the reviews, keep them coming so I know your thoughts. Much love xoxo**

* * *

10/Alex

The door flew open and Sean staggered into my apartment covered in blood and carrying a body. My first and only reaction was to scream when I saw Nikita's lifeless form, one arm swinging helplessly as Sean kicked the door shut and stormed to the sofa. I gestured for him to lie her down and he did so carefully. My hands fluttered over her body, checking if she was breathing. I felt a flutter of relief when I felt her chest rise and fall ever so slightly.

"What happened?" I demanded.

"Amanda," Sean's voice was low and dangerous. I studied his furious face for just a moment, taking in his sweat covered brow which was knitted with worry and cheeks smudged with Nikita's blood. I had a pile of towels laid on the coffee table and I tossed one to him.

"Nikita I need you to open your eyes," I cried before I ripped her shirt open to examine the damage. The entry wound was small and clean, but the bleeding wasn't stopping, even when I pressed a folded towel over it.

"Help me turn her over," I gasped and Sean bent to help me. We turned her just slightly for me to examine her back but I couldn't see an exit wound. The bullet was still in there and it needed removing fast.

There was a loud frantic knock at the door and Sean and I froze, sharing a terrified look. My hands were covered in blood and the front of my shirt was stained beyond repair. Sean took his gun from his pocket and slipped silently across the room like water. He threw the door open, pointing his gun expertly on whoever was outside.

"Whoa!" Michael cried, holding his hands up. Sean lowered the weapon and I heard him breathe a sigh of relief before ushering him inside and bolting the door shut. Michael was by my side in a heartbeat, clutching Nikita's hand. She had gained consciousness and was now howling in pain. The noise brought tears to my eyes and I wanted nothing more than to take away her pain. I needed to save her. She couldn't die on me, I wouldn't let her.

Michael uttered calming and loving words as he held her and even in the situation I couldn't help but envy their connection.

"Division will be on lockdown for the minimum of an hour before they can release anybody to hunt you down," he said to Sean quietly, never taking his focus from Nikita, "you best not be here when that happens because this will be the first place they look."

"She's lost a lot of blood," I sobbed, shoving the blood soaked towel away and pressing a fresh one to the wound. Sean made a low sound as he paced back and forth, his hands hooked on the back of his neck.

"Amanda was working with the Everwood's. She paid them to capture Nikita on the down-low and then bribed me into deleting their files. She knows about us, Alex, and she isn't going to forget it. She ordered me to kill Nikita, but I refused. A guard cornered us on the way to the parking lot and fired. I didn't know she'd been hit… I can't go back there," Sean hissed with such anger, not once stopping his frantic pacing. I stood up and went to him, putting my hands on his chest to stop his movement. Despite the blood which covered me, I took his face in my hands and kissed him furiously.

"I won't go back there," I breathed.

* * *

What seemed like hours passed. Michael had come prepared and with much screaming from Nikita, he had fished the bullet from the wound. I hadn't been able to watch. I had had to turn away and heave into the sink as I saw Michael fish in Nikita's flesh with his fingers for the bullet. Sean had held her down and she had shrieked so loud I thought the walls were going to cave in. I had stood back and let him, feeling so useless as I was unable to help. Nikita had drifted in and out of consciousness and Michael had used a burning spoon to cauterize the wound when the bleeding had lessened. Something about the skill he had made me think this wasn't the first time he had dealt with a situation like this. I had pulled out my First Aid kit from the bathroom and Michael had wound a bandage tightly around her torso.

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked quietly, my body shaking from the experience.

"From what I can see the bullet was shallow and missed any main organs," Michael murmured as he stroked Nikita's hair. I looked around my apartment at the blood stained couch, towels, floor. I was drenched in it and so were Michael and Sean. I didn't know how she had survived the blood loss but I was thankful.

"We need to get out of here," Sean murmured.

"I'm not leaving her," I said sternly. I meant it. I couldn't leave Nikita like this, so weak and vulnerable. Sean had explained everything and I felt so angry that Amanda would be so cruel and cowardly as to use an outside force to tackle Nikita. I hated her more than ever before. I hated her with all I was.

"Alex, Sean's right. If there is something going on between you two and Amanda knows, she will stop at nothing to tear you apart even if it means the death of one of you," Michael said quietly.

"I'm never going back to Division. They've taken everything away from me. I won't let them take you too," I breathed, turning to Sean. He folded me into his arms and I rested my head on his warm chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. He cradled me protectively and kissed the top of my head before holding me at arms-length. His eyes were intense as they burned into mine.

"I won't let that happen. But you're no longer safe in this apartment. We need to get out of here, as far away from Division as we can. We can do this, together. If I'm with you, nothing else matters. If I'm with you, they can't take anything away from me. If I'm with you, we've won," he said calmly, a cheeky smile glimmering in his eyes.

"Go…" Michael encouraged. I shot a glance to the couch where Nikita was resting.

"I…" I began to argue but Michael cut me off, holding up a hand and shaking his head.

"She's going to be fine, Alex. I'm going to move her. We have a number of safe houses we can go to. We'll go underground for a few months, and when she's fully recovered, we'll find you," he said slowly.

I entwined my fingers with Sean's and studied his face.

I glanced from Nikita to Michael and then finally I looked at Sean. He meant more to me than I could put into words, and with him by my side, I felt as though I could do anything. I had been so focused on pushing him away to keep him safe these past few weeks that I had forgotten how to let someone in. I needed him. I wasn't going to hide anymore and I wasn't going to refuse his affection. Together we would take down Division. Together we would create a world which didn't revolve around the orders and rules set by Amanda and those who she worked for. Together we would experience unity instead of division.

This wasn't over. I wouldn't let them silence me.

"Let's disappear," I smiled.

xoxo

* * *

**Thanks again! **

**So that is it.  
**

**Alex and Sean on the run together, possibly teaming up with Michael and Nikita in the future to take down Amanda.  
**

**Please review what you think of the ending.  
**

**If I get the green light from you guys I will write a sequel to this!  
**

**Exciting!  
**

**Thanks again  
**

**Much love  
**

**xoxoxoxox  
**


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